You’ve got a hold of me… don’t even know your power
WILL YOU PLEASE HAVE MERCY ON MY HEART, SHAWN MENDES.
Ok. So, I’m pretty obsessed with Shawn Mendes. Well, more than just obsessed if that’s even possible. So you would understand how long I’ve been anticipating with delirious eagerness to see him live…
The first song I ever heard of his was “Something Big” and at the time, I thought it was a nice little Disney-esque pop song. The song that really stole my heart though, was “Aftertaste”. It’s still to this very day my favourite song of his. I just love these lyrics:
“Turns out that no one can replace me,
I’m permanent, you can’t erase me”
I mean, aside from the literal context of the song about how he was cheated on, to me I take the lyric to mean that he’s irreplaceable. I find that when I’m feeling like I’m not good enough at the things I enjoy doing, I can just play this song and feel better. Because no matter what it is, there’s no one else in the world that can do what I do. I am uniquely me and no one can replace me.
“A Little Too Much” is probably my next favourite song of his.
“She would always tell herself she could do this,
She would use no help it would be just fine,
But when it got hard she would lose her focus,
So take my hand and we’ll be alright…”
I don’t think I really need to explain how relatable these lyrics are – not just for me, but for a lot of people out there who struggle with anxiety, depression or other illnesses whether they’re mental or physical.
Honestly, this year Shawn Mendes has given me a lot of inspiration when I needed it most. And that’s why I was so excited to finally see him live and to hear him sing the songs that have been on repeat on my playlist.
…And on Wednesday the 2nd of November, the wait was over.
But alas, I had a terrible, terrible day. In the morning, I had a YouTube event to attend so I had to wake up at 6:30am which is a tremendous effort for me. I’ve been feeling very ‘meh’ lately (lack of energy, lethargic, purposeless, existential etc.) so waking up so early was already setting me up for failure.
By the time the YouTube event ended at 3pm, I was dead exhausted and the only thing that was really keeping my feet moving was the fact that in a few hours, I would finally see Shawn Mendes live in the flesh. I arrived at The Enmore Theatre at about 4pm and already the line WAS SO LONG. It snaked around the alleyways and apparently some people had been waiting since midday! To be honest, I probably would have too if I didn’t go to the YouTube event.
Anyway, so I lined up amongst all the tweens and was contemplating my life decisions. Like, why was I, a 24-year-old grown woman waiting in line with all these 15-year-old girls with their butt cheeks hanging out their shorts and heels higher than the Empire State Building?
After 2 hours of waiting in the burning sun (I literally got sunburnt waiting for Shawn Mendes), Mattias finally came with food. Then at 6:30pm, the line started moving… which, you know, cool. But it said on the ticket that doors open at 7:15pm and Mattias and I still had to check in our backpacks. So Mattias hurriedly took our backpacks to the coat room but GUESS WHAT. We had to pay $6 in CASH to store our bags. CASH! Who uses CASH anymore?! We didn’t have any change on us.
SO YOU KNOW WHAT I HAD TO DO?! I HAD TO SACRIFICE MY PLACE IN THIS LONG-AS LINE THAT I HAD BEEN WAITING IN FOR OVER 3 HOURS TO FIND AN ATM TO GET CASH OUT TO STORE OUR STINKING BACKPACKS.
Oh. My. God. I actually had a mental breakdown. I was sweating, on the verge of tears. I couldn’t believe how terrible of a day I was having. I was tired, sunburnt and pissed off. It felt like the entire world had just ended before my very eyes. I was watching all these people who were behind me enter the theatre and for the life of me, I couldn’t find a bloody ATM.
After what felt like forever, we finally found an ATM and had to line up to store our damn backpacks. By the time we did that, THERE WAS NO MORE LINE. I literally lined up for 3 hours only to be at the back of the theatre.
So when Shawn finally came on stage, I quickly forgot all my worries. I forgot that I was tired. I forgot that life sucks. I forgot about my problems. Well, the only problem I had was that all the screaming girls were so damn loud. One day, it would be so amazing if I could just listen to Shawn Mendes live without a horde of screaming fan girls drowning out his voice.
Here’s some clips from the concert that Mattias filmed for me (and you will understand what I mean by the fan girls drowning out Shawn’s voice):
Anyway, if there’s anything I learnt from this experience, it’s that I’m never lining up for a concert again. I actually feel kind of silly that I had a mental breakdown. I mean, I can totally appreciate Shawn Mendes without having to be in the same room as him. His music has inspired me, and that should be enough.
And yep. That’s it. That’s my story.
I leave you now with my favourite live performance of his (sans the overpowering screams of the fangirls).
Until next time,
Check these posts out!
Let’s talk Pentatonix. If you haven’t heard of Pentatonix, you’ve been living under a rock devoid of YouTube. On Saturday, Mattias and I went to go watch this amazing acapella group live at the Enmore Theatre, Sydney. Read More…